Learning and Growing

Run, run, run!!!!  Oh how they run!  I've never walked so fast in my life.  It's like I'm in the olympics for speed walking.  From the time I walk up to the train in the morning and then later in the afternoon.  My first week of work I pulled a muscle in my leg, was out of breath and felt like I was in training. There are beautiful mountains to look at, crisp weather that isn't too cold and wonderful sunshine.  But we just run!!!  How I miss those leisurely walks where you could stroll.  Perhaps a mall walker may bump you a little, but no one is running you over. I see no signs here for "silver sneakers."  It must be city life.  It just pumps you up. 

Last week I had to get to work really early to be able to participate in a meeting at 9 a.m. eastern time.  I had to leave the house at 6:15 a.m. It was a foggy day and traffic was crazy.  Dave drove that day and it was insane.  While he was lining up to get into the parking lot, he said get out and walk.  So I got out and walked, of course I was heading in the wrong direction.  Dave banged on the car window and pointed the other way.  A nice construction worker helped me reach my destination.  Oh the kindness of strangers. 

So many new things to learn.  The train, how to use that music thing everyone sticks in their ears (I can't remember what it's called), the water dispencer, and those revolving doors in front of the building (like in Elf).  So much technology. 

Acceptance Brings Peace

Hey it's Friday and I realized I've been at peace for several days.  For the last 10 weeks I've struggled with that feeling.  Wondering if I would sense it again.  Being my age I knew eventually I would adjust to my new situation, but for a time I wandered down the path of grief which we all go down.  What's neat about that path is it leads to a beautiful flowered covered walkway, I like to call it acceptance.  I think you can step on that path whenever you want, but it's always our decision.   I'm not sure when it happened or why, but I'm glad I found it.  First I had to walk down that dark path called anger and then a brief trek up the hill of depression.

When you step on the path of peace your surroundings may not change.  The situations you encounter are usually still the same.  I'm still living in a new place with few relationships.  I still get lost.  There is no Dunkin Donuts here (coffee....) boy do I miss it.  I'm 2,000 miles away from my family.  So what happened?  I'm guessing it's trust.  Trusting that all things work together for good.  Believing that a hire power does have a plan.  Knowing that if I'm still and wait what needs to happen will.  For me, it's settling into my situation.

So I hope that whatever path you may be on today, whether it's loneliness, fear, anger, or sadness that soon you'll see the flowers and feel the peace.  I know it's right around the corner.

What I Learned At the Light House.

Over the weekend I attended my brother in laws memorial service.  He passed away on June 29th after a long battle with cancer.  Tom was a fire fighter for almost 25 years.  He asked that there be a party instead of a typical church service.  So the event was held at Ponce Inlet State Park, right on the beach. 

It was a beautiful day.  The sun was shining and the gentle breeze made a hot day tolerable.  There were about 60 people who came.  Most of them were fellow fire fighters who have worked with Tom over the years.  They brought food and beer and shared humorous stories about this quiet but very funny man.  He was only 49.

As I watched, listened and pondered I realized how fleeting life can be.  So much of what I hold important isn’t.  What I think matters doesn’t.  It’s not things but relationships that make this life successful.  It made me wonder how I affect people when I’m around.  Are they inspired?  Do they feel loved?  When they walk away are the hopeful?  Have I helped them?  Are they better for knowing me?  Seeing a life well lived that ended to quick makes you asked these questions, seek to make the changes needed, and hope the above questions receive good answers more often than not.  Thank you Tom for living a life that inspired me to dig deep.

            I decided to end this with a joke.  Tom would appreciate it:

A Catholic priest, a Protestant minister, and a rabbi are discussing what they would like people to say after they die and their bodies are being prepared for burial.
Priest: I would like someone to say, “He was a righteous man, an honest man, and very generous.”

Minister: I would like someone to say, “He was very kind and fair, and he was very good to his parishioners.”

Rabbi: I would want someone to say, “Look! He’s moving!”

Date Night at the Grocery Store

I've been blessed to be able to live with one person for 29 years.  This person has seen the best and the worst of me.  We've had years of famine and years of feast.  We've had laughs and tears.  I can enter the room with my hair up and no make-up on and he never complains. 

That's why date nights at the grocery store are so special.  We're older now so eating right and taking vitamins has become important.  We walk slowly through the store together reading labels and sharing with each other information we've read or heard.  We discuss how we wish our kids would eat right, but figure they will when they are 50.  It's the beauty of being together, the beauty of being one. 

This wonderful, forgiving, caring and hard working man is my kindred spirit.  He's my best friend.  So he doesn't like to shop at the mall, hates sitting around and drinking coffee, forget chick flicks, and please don't make him go to a seminar.  But those things that count, a simple walk in the grocery store, that's what truly matters.  With hair up and no make-up.  It was very romantic.  I fell in love with him all over again.

9 Weeks and Counting

My daughter suggested I start a blog.  She thought it would help me to write what I'm feeling about moving across the country.  I wish I could say it's been fantastic, that I've enjoyed each day since I arrived.  But honestly I have been feeling like a woman on an Island alone.  I like to think I'm a spiritual person, so I believe that the ups and downs in life make all of us better people.  Unfortunately, I am a big baby and hate it when my world is turned upside down.  What prompted me today to actually start this blog was "Visiting a Church."

My husband is a good man, but doing cold calls isn't his speciality.  So today he said I could be the scout and check out this church.  I'm really not afraid to talk to anyone, however I do hate walking in by myself. While I was doing it I kept thinking how much he owed me.  So like a good soldier, one desperate for human contact, I ventured in.  It was a lovely place, decorated nicely, and very modern.  I slowly looked over the sitting and took my place in the back hoping desprately that someone would notice me.

I guess you could call me a friend addict.  I just loved my friends and having left them 2000 miles away has been difficult.  So my deepest desire and earnest prayer has been, please let me meet someone I can connect with.  Someone to have coffee with.  Somone who could connect me with others.  Now, understand I have a someone who I walk with once a week.  But she's very busy with her family and I'm grateful for the time she has given me.  But it would be great to be able to take an exercise class with someone, attend a bible study, or get a phone call with an invite to go shopping

But today wasn't the day for me to meet that kindred spirit.  As I sat in my seat feeling completely invisible wanting to cry.  I had to make a decision, I could travel down the path of despair that ends up at pity party cafe.  Or I could say that tomorrow is another day and it could be the day when I meet my new Colorado friend.  I know that in time, the right time I will meet that special person that God has picked out for me.  I just have to let Him do it.